She stumbled stiff-legged into her bathroom. 

“Fuuuuuuuuuuck,” she thought. She knew she was done-for.

Carefully, she peeled her damp tank top off of her abdomen and went to raise her arms.

She hissed in pain as her damaged skin creased in on itself. 

After a few breaths, she decided that getting it over with quickly would be the best option. 

Three more preparatory breaths and she straightened out her arms over her head, pulling free the clinging top.

“Motherfucker!” She sighed in relief once she could let her arms back down at her sides.

Slowly reaching behind her back, she groped for the string that would undo her bikini. 

Drops of water were wrung out as she pulled it free. 

She sighed again at the release of strain on her neck. 

Leaving the other strings tied, she lowered her head to remove the swim suit completely.

Now she could see the extent of the burn.

It looked like she was wearing a pale skin-toned bikini top that just happened to have nipples in the design. 

Everywhere else, where her normal skin-tone should be, she was pink as a valentine.

“Lovely,” she thought. 

Gingerly, she pivoted and twisted to take a look at her back.

“At least I’ll tan evenly.”

She looked up at the cupboard above the toilet; she knew it housed some aloe. 

Sweet, cool bliss was within arm’s reach and yet it meant stretching and bending her hot, tender skin.

“It’ll be worth it. It’s necessary.”

She strategized. Would a quick, well-maneuvered retrieval be best? Should she painstakingly move millimeter by millimeter to avoid the flash of agony?

“Fuck it.” Quick it was.

She shot her left hand up and grasped the door handle, gritting her teeth through the sudden onslaught of fire within her shoulder. Her right hand moved simultaneously into the cupboard as the left hand pulled it open, grabbing the tube of aloe like a frog’s tongue catching a fly.

She let both arms drop back to her sides, making sure to throw the brakes on at the last second so that they didn’t collide into her equally-lava-like thighs. 

The pain was completely ignored now as she flipped the cap open. 

The gel felt wonderfully cold in her hand as she squeezed out a generous glob.

She spread it between her hands, but was careful not to warm it up with too much friction. 

Wasting no time, she ran her right hand up her forearm from her wrist to her shoulder, twisting her left arm on her right hand’s way back down to the wrist. She did the same to her right arm, then made sure both arms and shoulders were totally covered. 

The aloe seemed to work instantly. 

Now that she had better motion of her arms, she made work of smoothing the gel from her chest to the top of her shorts, down her sides, and as much of her lower back as she could manage.

She didn’t even want to think about bending over to apply the gel to her legs. 

After getting another squeeze of aloe in her palm, she gave some to the other palm and reached up and over her shoulders to do her trapezius muscles; then crossed both arms in front to get her latissimus. 

Her arms would only go so far, however, and she could not get the middle of her back.

As it happens, that’s where it was most painful.

She scanned her messy countertop for something, anything that she could use. 

She wished she had one of those back-scratcher things her grandma always had. She could flip it over and use the smooth side…

Maybe she could use a spatula or something..

Then her eyes landed on a silicone erection.

She bit her bottom lip as she mentally worked out the logistics. 

Yep, it was long enough to reach.

She chuckled incredulously to herself and figured this was the best way.

Picking up the dildo in one hand and the aloe in the other, she squirted the aloe on the glans and about an inch of the shaft. 

In full-fledged fits of laughter now, she used a finger to spread the aloe evenly before gripping the end of the toy.

Shaking her head, she turned to see her back in the mirror, raising her right arm (and the dildo) over her head.

The cock was the perfect size, well, length, for the job and she was able to sufficiently coat her sunburnt back with the cooling gel.

Still laughing, but proud of her resourcefulness, she turned on the tap to wash away the excess.

“That was satisfying,” she told the dildo, as she wanked washed it off under the water.

Loose versus Lose My Inhibitions

Reading fanfiction oh yeah, I read that shit makes me feel many things, like feels, but then there are times when reading it inspires me to write my own little ficlets. (And I use ‘ficlets’ incredibly loosely (ha!) because they’re really glorified paragraphs).

For example:

A fic which says “…the man who was causing me to loose my sanity…” causes me to wonder if ‘loose’ was a mistake or intentional. Because I could just as easily continue with: “He brushed his fingertips lightly over my wrist and down to where my fingers were clasped tightly around the end of the leash. ‘Darling,’ he whispered against my neck, ‘you have to let it go.’ With a sigh, I let my eyes slip shut as I slowly relaxed my hand. The loop of the leash slid down my fingers and dropped with a quiet thump into the grass. My sanity seemed to realize instantly that it was able to run, and it took off like a rocket.”

For another example:

A fic which says “…starting to loose myself in the heat…” leads me to think: “I had just yesterday gotten over the release of my sanity. Though I could still feel the buttery leather of the leash in my palm. ‘Darling, you know you must finish it,’ he said as he wrapped his strong arms around my middle. ‘But I’ll fall,’ I protested. Even with his support, I was unconvinced at my survival. ‘Not while I’ve got you held so securely against me,’ he murmured into the nape of neck. I took a deep breath and squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as I could. In a rush, I breathed out and felt my soul wisp past my lips and into the warm summer air.”


Now, I should mention that this isn’t a slight at all against fic authors. Even fic authors who accidentally use incorrect grammar. Even fic authors who intentionally use incorrect grammar. No matter the reason, or lack thereof, it has inspired me to do whatever that was, up there. Also, I realize I’m not as original as I originally thought – because the first one happened yesterday, the second happened recently, and they’re both super similar.

And, to the four-ish people I know who actually read this tripe:

%d bloggers like this: